when you met your best friend
0
i need to process some thoughts.
this isn't meant to slight anyone, but i don't feel like i have a "best friend". i have regrets concerning said topic, but they're not the regrets you'd imagine i'd have. i'm absolutely not ready to make nice, but there are missing parts to my life. lately, this feeling is constant.
i feel incompetent, inadequate, incapable.
one of the absolute best parts of my life is being a teacher. but, even there, i feel that sense of being inadequate, of not being everything to everyone. it's just not making the same return as a better-placed investment might.
a best friend, a friend, family, a partner, someone who cares about you is someone who's vested in you. parts of these people exist inside each of us who's lucky enough to experience these kinds of close relationships. when i look at those i care about, i see little pieces of myself that i've given away. i give these pieces of myself away because the giving-away part is really just the process of making an investment in life. and these investments are what keep us healthy, help us grow, help us be stronger. that process helps all parties involved to grow and to be stronger. i seriously think it has something to do with the secret to life's meaning.
life is racing at me rather quickly, and there's a rather large chunk of my life behind me. i don't want to keep moving forward without having control over what's happening. i don't want to miss the good parts, like i have for most of what's behind me.
keeping any relationship afloat is a struggle, but it's those struggles that make our relationships worth something.
yet, i'm here when this should be a long conversation in a darkened candle-lit room with one of my best friends, maybe even the best best friend. i make mistakes. but i deserve to have those affected to push me around just a little.
(too bad some people come from a long line of people who don't trust others enough to make any investment at all. [they're the most difficult to hold onto.])
so do you remember where you were when you met your best friend?
this isn't meant to slight anyone, but i don't feel like i have a "best friend". i have regrets concerning said topic, but they're not the regrets you'd imagine i'd have. i'm absolutely not ready to make nice, but there are missing parts to my life. lately, this feeling is constant.
i feel incompetent, inadequate, incapable.
one of the absolute best parts of my life is being a teacher. but, even there, i feel that sense of being inadequate, of not being everything to everyone. it's just not making the same return as a better-placed investment might.
a best friend, a friend, family, a partner, someone who cares about you is someone who's vested in you. parts of these people exist inside each of us who's lucky enough to experience these kinds of close relationships. when i look at those i care about, i see little pieces of myself that i've given away. i give these pieces of myself away because the giving-away part is really just the process of making an investment in life. and these investments are what keep us healthy, help us grow, help us be stronger. that process helps all parties involved to grow and to be stronger. i seriously think it has something to do with the secret to life's meaning.
life is racing at me rather quickly, and there's a rather large chunk of my life behind me. i don't want to keep moving forward without having control over what's happening. i don't want to miss the good parts, like i have for most of what's behind me.
keeping any relationship afloat is a struggle, but it's those struggles that make our relationships worth something.
yet, i'm here when this should be a long conversation in a darkened candle-lit room with one of my best friends, maybe even the best best friend. i make mistakes. but i deserve to have those affected to push me around just a little.
(too bad some people come from a long line of people who don't trust others enough to make any investment at all. [they're the most difficult to hold onto.])
so do you remember where you were when you met your best friend?
More about the phenomenal author
I don't know how to get over someone as dangerous, tainted, and flawed as you. You're screwed up and brilliant, look like a million dollar man. So why is my heart broke?
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