fucked. hard.

perhaps i'm a heartless cunt.  no.  scratch that.  i am a heartless cunt.  i don't have what it takes to sit in front of the television dissecting the ins and outs of this massacre.  yes, it's horrible, but i have no connection to it whatsoever.  yes, i'm an elementary teacher, and yes i have two kids who go to the elementary school where i teach.  but this didn't happen to me.  it didn't happen to us.  i can't be horrified, but i know it's horrific.  i felt the same thing on 9/11.  shitty fucking event, but i was unable to feel the terror and the horror.  how many people out there feel as i do, but they're just crying and obsessing over it because they feel that they should?  they feel it's the normal shit to do?  what if we all stopped living the lives we think we should and just lived the lives we're here to live?  how the fuck would that change the motherfucking universe? 

in other news, i want fucked.  hard.  by a stud and a half.